Thanksgiving sent me into an emotional tailspin – Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays, and one of my mother’s favorite holidays. We were always together for Thanksgiving at her home or mine, until 2012 when she was too ill to come to my home, so I had to go see her in the nursing home – a very unsatisfying way to spend the holiday … but I still got to spend the holiday with her – this year that was not possible. So it was surprisingly hard. There was no one else who liked sweet potatoes, so we didn’t have sweet potatoes – I didn’t feel like making them just for myself with all the other dishes I was cooking.
I feel like I’m still dealing with not being able to see her on a day I had always seen her, every Thanksgiving of my life. I listen to songs on the radio, and they are always about “love” as romantic love and losing a boyfriend/girlfriend/love interest, or falling in love, etc., etc. – no one ever writes songs about losing their parents. We just all see it as inevitable, and NO ONE ever talks about it, let alone sings songs about it. Not that music makes things ok, but I have always found music to be healing. It’s probably like parents in general – underappreciated and underrecognized until they’re gone.